Shouldn't laugh...but I will

There is a girl I used to go to school, and then college wiith. To say she is accident prone is probably the understatement of the century. At college we used to sit and watch her (with our sausage rolls or cakes in hand, like we were at the cinema), waiting for her to walk into a table, or a concrete pillar, as she so often did. To protect her dignity (what's left of it anyway, after all the catastrophe's!), I shall refer to her as Calamity K. Anyhoo, I see Calamity K around and about our village, and she used to work in the McDonalds in our local Asda. It was here that I witnessed what I assume (and hope, for her sake) to be her biggest calamity yet. As I was loading the shopping into the car, I saw her get into her crapmobile (I couldn't tell what make it was for all the dings and scrapes on it). I stood there, open-mouthed, as she reversed - straight into the side of a BMW waiting and indicating to get into a parking space. Eek. So you can imagine my horror when I saw her pull up next to me at the petrol station this morning - in a brand new Ford S-Max! I give it a week before she's parked it in the middle of a lake.